I mention no celebrities or people in the news. I mention no woman who was just found dead caused by a spouse or domestic partner. I ain't even talking about the women who have learned to be silent in order to keep the peace in the household because it is easier than catching the back hand of hell. Not that it will stop it from coming. It is a delay tactic at best.
Before I get rolling on this topic you should know that the performer in the video is Vivian Green and this name of the song is Emotional Rollercoaster.
So long as there is a foot on the throat of a single women we will all be damned. What shames us is that so many have asked heart breaking questions like, "What did she do?" or "You know those skirts were kinda short, she was asking for it?" or "She should have just shut up, she took it too far and this is what you get."
And no fellas, I'm not leaving you out of the picture. I know that some of you have been assaulted by women as well.
Educated women have said these things. Hood Rats have said these things. Women who have been beat within an inch of their lives have said these things. Women who don't know just how the use of power can blind a woman to her rightful nature as a human being. It is not love if he beats you like an enemy combatant. True love does not leave bruise marks on your soul.
There is an old line that Black men use to say to Black women. " I do you like I do you cuz I thought you could take it."
In the old days that line was sometimes met by Black women with hot grease, oatmeal in the lap or the ringing chimes of a cast iron skillet. I am not advocating violence, except in the case of self-defense. I'm just telling you what was tolerated and what was not. Let it be know, that I have two cast iron skillets, a really big one and a small camping one.
I know my history. It will not be repeated.
I write this not for the victims. But for the people that asked the questions that hurt. They do not understand the deadly seriousness of domestic and partner violence. For people that are taking up sides when in fact this is a multi-layered problem. I write this for people who think it is a man's prerogative to make a woman suffer because it is his god given rights.
No. it is not. It is a crime when the first slap, punch or kick is delivered.
I write this for those misguided and misinformed people that believe that a woman should be punished if she did something wrong is acceptable.
No. Never. It is and always has been wrong.
If you know somebody like that read them a page of two from one of the resources listed. Start to move the conversation away from dehumanizing to coming to consciousness. Save a mind. Save a life.
Resources:
- Institute on Domestic Violence in the African American Community http://dvinstitute.org
- Domestic Violence Awareness Handbook http://www.da.usda.gov/shmd/aware.htm
- Feminist.org 911 page http://feminist.org/911/crisis.html
- Women's Health Page http://www.4woman.gov/violence
- Women Lawyers Resource page http://www.womenlawyers.com/domestic.htm
- Medline Plus Information page http://medlineplus.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/domesticviolence.html
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