Thursday, July 23, 2009

Getting Lost In Chicago On A Rainy Thursday Night

This has been a day of metaphors and thing going wrong and then they go right. And then left. I got to the airport on time but the ATM wasn't working. But I found money in my bag.

5 hours later I get here and the ATM still wasn't working so that means the ATM network had a really bad day. Except that I wanted to have funds so I went out looking for the bank in a city that I do not know.

Chicago has upper and lower level streets. How you cross the street is different so I had to adjust for that; meaning I saw people walk in front of cars and the drivers stopped, even when the people where in the wrong.

You might not think s a big thing but where I come from there were a number of cases where the pedestrian had the legal light and bam, human roadkill. Recently a car hit a poor soul, dude landed on the windshield and the driver got out of the car and pushed him off and kept going.

Wish I could say it was an isolated, one time thing but it is not. Anyway, I got real lost and my feet hurt and it was raining and I felt like a little kid. I did ask folks but no one seemed to know where the hotel was located or I couldn't follow directions. That left/right thing is a killer.

Finally got a cab. I have to be hurting and totally frustrated to get a cab but sometimes you have to yield to common sense. Come to find out I was way over on the other side of town. I don't know how I got so far over.

Went to the party. I couldn't believe it. It was a psychology experiment playing out in real life. I got lost but it was in observing people jockeying for swag and men jockeying for attention.

Personally, them little bunny buzzer ain't up to the task. Real women need A/C or if you swing that way D/C. No, that doesn't work. Plugs, we need plug powered devices.

It was hearing this one dude complaining that no one would pay attention to him. That these women were "anti-male." He did not understand what was going on. They were not anti-male they were "pro-swag." Other men sauntered in and laid down old bait but they couldn't draw more than a breath.

Let me put it to you this way. Free liquor or a bag of swag? Yes, for some of us it is the swag. Plus you still could get the liquor so this is a win/win situation.

Except for the guys.

Tell you the truth I was lost. Again. I came back to the hotel room. I'd been in some form of it before. Not sure I want to go back out there but I will.

I never did find the bank.

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