Thursday, March 22, 2012

Testimony - It Gets Better Video from SFGMC

Not sure I should be writing about this video. I'm not gay. I am not a male. Don't even live in San Francisco. But when did that stop anybody from putting their two cents in matters that peripherally concern them.

I do know other human beings attempt to hurt another because they are different. Too small. Too large Talk funny.

I know the power of words that can hurt, of punching used as a right of passage and the emotional pain that can be soul crushing. Ask anyone that had been bullied as a child. It does not take much to bring up the memories.They know what I am talking about.

So I am very interested in the It Gets Better video series. If it stops one teen or pre-teen from doing themselves in it works for me.

This is a video by the San Francisco Gay Men's Chorus called Testimony.

It is only recently that I have slowly started talking about being bullied as a child.

It was bad.

Wait, there is no good form of being bullied.

I have since learned that other people had matches thrown on their hair or coats. Humiliated beyond measure with all kinds of stuff thrown on their bodes. And last, but not least, sanctioned shame.
Because if you tell some adults that you are indeed being victimized by a group of people most will tell you to "suck it up and get over it".

While you are standing in the middle of hell. You ask someone to help you and they are telling you to stand and continue to get burned. They say it is kid stuff. I am hear to tell you that kids can be vicious.

For me, I literally had to go ape shit crazy and beat someone up to get most of them off my back. It was a temporary solution. It wasn't in my nature but you hurt a person enough and one way or another they will find a solution.

Usually, a bad one. Suicide is a very bad solution. It doesn't matter who you are, it truly hurts those that are left behind.

I was a gentle person who learned to be defensive and non-trusting. "Suck it up" they say. The reality is that you never, ever get totally over it.

So, as a straight woman, as a person with a history that includes being bullied and as a fellow traveler on this road of life check I want to pass this video along to friends and acquaintances.

If you like the song and would like to own a legal copy then you can go to the Bandcamp page and download it. It would help the SFGMC chorus earn a little cash in the stash.

Some days are rough. Still, it gets better.

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Lessons Part 2 - Learning That We Mirror Each Other

People are nosy. I am a people, therefore, I am nosy.

I try to control it but there are times when you just have to pay attention to other people’s business. I did not want to but I really had no choice.

Every once in a while I’ll buy a burrito from Chipotle.  I was standing in line and the person ordering before me put in her order for three burritos.

Like a drill sergeant she commanded what she wanted. Sarg wanted everything. She wanted extra of everything. Except for what she did not want.

I could see trouble coming.

When it came time to fold the burrito the laws of mass and space kicked in. The tortilla ripped a gash. Food started oozing like a scene from The Blob.

The server tried to move the heaping mass to another tortilla. Sarg became irate:
“That looks like garbage. Something you would feed a pig. I’m not a pig. Start over!”
I'm looking at Sarg.

No comment.

The food was thrown away. The server started again. Sarg told the server what she wanted extra again except for what she did not want.

I don’t know how it was possible but this time the burrito was constructed. Then the whole thing had to be done for the other two burritos she ordered.

My Turn

I was hungry. Yet a sense of culinary moderation flowed from within. I modified my order:
  • Carne Asada
  • No Beans
  • Rice
  • Corn
  • Pepper/Onions
  • Avocado
I bring it home and eat it. All of it. I am stuffed for the next four hours.

A few days later I watch the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead about this guy’s having a fruit and vegetable juicing fast as he interviews people across the country.

I don’t make it half way though the movie without swearing I’m gonna get a juicer.

I’ve checked out the high toned ones. They are very expensive. It will be awhile. In the meantime, I’m drinking water instead of soda and eating more veggies. Truth is, I am surrounded by temptation. And boredom. And other stuff too.  I’m stripping it away step by step.

My body agrees with making some kind of change. Sarg is still on my mind. I can’t seem to let that movie go until I do something. This is the back side of being nosy.
So, yeah. There are times when being silently, acutely observant of other people’s behavior is kinda sorta ok.

But not really.

Sunday, March 04, 2012

Lessons We Need to Understand–Part 1

It has been a week of extremes. Excitement and disappointment. Sometimes it happens at the same time. I have facts but the interpretation of those facts I’m not sure I can do justice. I can tell you what I have seen and observed.

The ZeFrank Lessons

Once upon a time there was a web series called Le Show with ZeFrank. The two people below are not ZeFrank but part of the community at the time that participated in introducing the show. Roll that tape...

It was before Jon Stewart and Colbert and the show was a mix of whimsy, politics, audience collaboration and what ever can down the road. It lasted a year before Ze pulled the plug.

Last week Ze put out the word on Kickstarer that he wanted to resume the show and was looking for backers to fund it. He is going to, among other things, buy a new camera and hire an editor.

He asked for $50,000. Keep in mind that his show lasted only one year that ended in 2007. There were other sporadic appearances by Ze via Time Magazine and other places but folks had moved on.
As of this writing, Ze has $122,282 with four days to go in the campaign.

Ze has asked his backers what they would like to see in the new show. In full disclosure, I did chip in some cash which makes me a non-Hollywood fractional inconsequential non-power playing mogul.
  • Most want him to do what he did before. Exactly the same things.
  • Some want him to talk about religion.
  • Others emphatically do not want him to talk about religion
  • Those that want him to rip into the current political climate of yuck.
  • Those that want a respite from the political climate of yuck and want him to make music or design or anything that is happening in the current world.
  • And there is a fractional few that says “I trust you enough to let you go you way and see what you come up with.”
This is the creative community "put your money where your support is" type of participatory media. I keep telling folks that what we were raised up on is not how it is always going to be from this point forward.

There is events happening that we can’t continue to pretend it does not have an impact on our lives.  Like a broken record I keep saying this and I need to find a better way of communicating it or shut up.

I have it on good authority I can’t shut up.

Here is the thing. As traditional broadcasters look to restrict access to their content and at the same time create destination portals on the Internet we need to really step up independent content.
I don’t think it needs a Kickstarter campaign but you do what you got to do.  If you are good and people like what you do you will be supported.

We don’t have to be dependent on mainstream content. I’m not saying to totally give it up cuz that new Sherlock Holmes on the BBC has got a bunch of Baker Street Doxies going nuts.

I’ve moved to audio podcasting and video from non-traditional sources to replace television. I do watch traditional shows once in a while on the Internet but they do not fill my needs.

A new model is being established. ZeFrank is not the first person to do this; there are other producers who are doing the same things.We needs to pay attention.

That is all I’m saying.